Characteristics of the Spirit of Strife
Once you know the characteristics of the spirit of strife, you can put it on the run. When that happens, you stop living in a cocoon of suppressed anger. That’s because whatever you bottle up eventually explodes and crushes anything in its path. Objects you throw against a wall don’t feel anything but people suffer and carry wounds you inflict when you entertain strife.
Strife causes marriages to crumble, splits churches, and dissolves business partnerships. So, what exactly is strife? What about it causes so much trouble and dissension?
First, let’s see what it looks like by identifying its deadly traits to get rid of strife.
Characteristics of the Spirit of Strife: See It’s Ugliness
Readily seen in marriages, strife enters through the door of hatred disguised as discontent. Do you ever stay at the front of the battlefield and wage a continuing war to disarm your partner?
Maybe they forgot your birthday or anniversary, accidentally broke the TV remote, or didn’t pay the water bill. Strife is unattractive and repulsive.
Strife initiates silent treatments, makes snide remarks, or belittles people in front of others. Proverbs 10:12 and Proverbs 29:22 reveal that hate and anger are behind strife and love puts a stop to bickering.
Contentious quarrels, unfounded lies, aggressive behavior, and an unruly tongue all magnify strife in your life. Give strife the upper hand and you welcome in a quarrelsome spirit that engenders ill will towards everyone you meet. You may even get cozy with gossiping and backbiting directed towards friends and loved ones.
Characteristics of the Spirit of Strife: Self-Gratification, Jealousy, Greed, and Pride
When you tire of living in conflict and letting it control your actions, you’ll find the root cause of strife. At the top of the strife perpetrators list is self-gratification. When you want to be the top dog by knocking over people, it’s time to take a step back. Self-aggrandizement on an ego trip gone south is hard to watch in others and nearly impossible to see in yourself.
Here’s how to know when strife has a foothold. When you draw attention to your importance and power, you’re the one in a crowd no one flocks to.
Coming in second on the strife culprit list are the twin offenders, jealousy and greed. Unfortunately, these traits are especially prevalent in the lives of Christians. For instance, God promotes someone else to a position you secretly crave or another Christian buys what you’ve wanted for decades.
What’s your reaction? You seethe silently rather than rejoice with them.
In James 4:1-2, the writer reveals the heart of a person consumed by jealousy and greed.
“Where do you think all these appalling wars and quarrels come from? Do you think they just happen? Think again. They come about because you want your own way, and fight for it deep inside yourselves. You lust for what you don’t have and are willing to kill to get it; and want what isn’t yours risking violence to get your hands on it. You wouldn’t think of just asking God for it, would you? And why not? Because you know you’d be asking for what you have no right to.”
Then, pride steps up to take over when self, jealousy, and greed take a break. Its nature is to consider others as worthless, destroy human relationships, and have no association with God whatsoever. It never apologizes, admits fault, or forgives.
How to Avoid Strife: Develop an Action Plan
If strife rises to the top, notice who you hang out with. That doesn’t mean you leave your husband and wife because they’re contentious. You learn when strife is present to back away from confrontation. That said, it’s harder to live with someone who thrives on conflict. For Christians, it’s an opportunity to produce other fruit such as patience, peace, and gentleness, even if the other person doesn’t change.
Be aware of bodily indicators that let you know when anger boils. Your face flushes, you feel like kicking the dog or cat, or want to go off on anyone nearby. The best approach to stop strife can be as simple as recognizing how it affects you.
For instance. Abraham (our Biblical ancestor) sidestepped a controversial issue when he and his nephew’s herdsmen quarreled and fought over possessions. Good ole’ Abe quails the contention by letting Lot choose what land he wants first (Genesis 13:7-11). The patriarch stopped the culprits of strife and ended disharmony immediately.
If there are disagreements in your household about money, working hours, chores, or anything else—see how quickly strife resolves by making wise choices where everyone wins. Once you abandon arguments, it takes the wind out of strife’s sails.
Having unity of purpose or sharing a common cause in a partnership puts an end to squabbles and disagreements. Whenever selfishness rears its ugly head to undermine unity, you can make adjustments on the spot.
Characteristics of the Spirit of Strife: Apply Scripture
“The servant of the Lord will not strive” (2 Timothy 2:24). Once I tapped this scripture to my office desk because everyone walking into the room had a bone to pick. I refused to take sides or join their combative behavior.
Plus, the posted scripture let them know they should behave the same way and become a lighthouse for others. The Message translation below expresses 2 Timothy 2:22-25 and strife perfectly.
“Run away from infantile indulgence. Run after mature righteousness—faith, love, peace—joining those who are in honest and serious prayer before God. Refuse to get involved in inane discussions; they always end up in fights. God’s servant must not be argumentative, but a gentle listener and a teacher who keeps cool, working firmly but patiently with those who refuse to obey.”
Get Rid of Strife Forever
Once you understand the deadliness of strife and take steps to eliminate it from your life, you feel and behave differently. Without so much as a wince, you offer the best parking spaces to others, open doors so others go first, and flee as fast as you can from strife’s power to destroy.
By knowing the characteristics of the spirit of strife, you put the needs of others above your own when love (AKA Jesus) resides in your heart. Otherwise, strife will control your every step if you let it.